


A Fist Full of Feelings

by cowboylakay



Series: No Glory in the West [1]
Category: Community (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Western, Getting Together, Love Confessions, M/M, Mutual Pining, mentioned troy barnes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-14
Updated: 2021-01-14
Packaged: 2021-03-12 00:15:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,374
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28751265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cowboylakay/pseuds/cowboylakay
Summary: Abed overthinks a question and it turns out pretty alright for him. Western AU.
Relationships: Abed Nadir/Jeff Winger
Series: No Glory in the West [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2112459
Comments: 4
Kudos: 18





	A Fist Full of Feelings

“You ever think about getting out of the life?”

Abed mulls over this question. It’s one he’s asked himself more times than he could count. The question usually brings more questions, like _“do I have a plan for if I do?”_ and _“could I still ride out with Troy?”_ and _“would the law stop chasing me?”_ and _“would I still have these moments with you?”_

“Yes,” He responds, decides not to keep Jeff waiting. He watches the cowboy bite his lip in thought, dark hat shielding him from the sun’s rays. Abed thinks he looks beautiful like this, and that the bounty posters don’t do him justice. He hears the clink of Jeff’s spurs as he crosses one boot-clad foot over the other.

“Would you tell me?” Jeff asks, and his tone has taken on a different note; whereas his question before had been curious, he sounds nervous now. Abed could count on one hand how many times he’s heard Jeff Winger sound nervous. “Not that I—”

“I would,” Abed cuts him off, because he knows what he’s about to say, and he _is_ special. He’s special to Abed, who sees him for more than the roguishly handsome murderous outlaw that civilisation and scalp hunters and lawmen see him as. He’s special because they’re similar in more ways than most people, in ways that he’s only found in Troy, who he loves in a completely different way from Jeff. He’s special _because_ he’s Jeff. “I would tell you before I leave, and I would—”

He cuts himself off this time. He’s said too much, and if he says any more then Jeff will realise he doesn’t want to be around Abed, who feels attraction come over him for men just as much as he does for women, who gets nervous about saying the wrong thing around Jeff more than he does around other people, who just wants to hold Jeff’s hand and kiss him and taste him in the way church folk would lynch him for, even beside the colour of his skin and the shape of his nose.

“Would what?” Jeff asks quietly, and it’s the wrong question, because now Abed has to answer. Now he has to tell the truth, because lying to Jeff feels worse than telling him the truth, even if that truth could put an end to the friendship they’ve built over the years. He closes his eyes, plays with the hem of his too-warm poncho, becomes hyperaware of the grass against his skin and the heat of the Texan sun.

“Would ask you to come with me,” Abed says, voice barely above a whisper. He lets the wind take them away, hopes it doesn’t reach Jeff’s ears and that he thinks Abed has fallen asleep. He feels like he can hear his mare’s grazing, but that can’t be true, because she’s more than fifteen feet away from them.

Then a hand touches his own, causing him to flinch. The hand retracts and his eyes shoot open, glancing down at where Jeff’s hand is hovering close by. Unable to look at him, he watches as his hand closes into a fist for half a moment and tries again, slipping it into Abed’s own and tentatively entangling their fingers together.

He’s reminded of the first time Jeff had touched him in a way he thought was more than friendly. It had been after a mad escape from a town they’d stumbled into, having robbed a stagecoach they both had scoped out and decided to work together on. High on the winnings and more than a little careless with how they spent it, they came to have a good time, only to be chased out the doors of the saloon and into the night the moment they stepped in, right when the sheriff and his deputies had started drinking.

That night had been eventful, to say the least. The sheriff recognised him instantly, being somewhat of an anomaly amongst white outlaws, then they made the connection that Jeff was the outlaw that Abed ran with occasionally, and it went downhill from there. They hadn’t even gotten a word out before the sheriff began reaching for his six-shooter and they bolted out the door, kicking their mares into a frenzy to get out of the town with the sounds of guns firing and people screaming behind them.

When they found a place to lie low, they’d laughed about it. Of all the towns to go to, they ended up in one that had pictures of their faces plastered up on a bulletin board in the saloon. Despite being particularly well-known menaces to society in the south, Abed had expected to be discovered after he’d ordered a drink, not before he even got to get a good glimpse at the pianist and at the selection of whiskey and scotch.

Abed had told Jeff that, enjoyed the laugh it got out of him, and rested by a boulder. Jeff sat beside him, still thrumming with excess energy, but seemingly happy to just sit with him. Then, he rested his head on Abed’s shoulder, which had been slightly awkward considering Jeff was slightly taller and Abed was sort of slouching, but Jeff chose to crane his neck further rather than sit up straight again.

He thinks about that now, as he tries to process Jeff’s hand in his. It’s kind of sweaty, but he doesn’t know if that’s his hand or Jeff’s, and he honestly doesn’t care. He likes the feeling of his gun-roughed hand in his.

“I... think I would,” Jeff says after awhile. Abed swallows against the lump in his throat. “Would leave with you, I mean. This life isn’t exactly...”

“Long-lasting?” Abed offers, finally looking up to meet his eyes. Jeff looks at him, has been looking for awhile, and smiles.

“Exactly,” He replies, looking back out towards the distance. “I’ve been in the life for... for forever. I thought it’d kill me, and maybe it still will, but being with you makes me...” He trails off, gnawing at his lip again. He swallows, a motion Abed watches. “I’d see it through. If it meant a townhouse or a bank vault or under a tree ‘neath the night sky, I wouldn’t care, ‘cause...” He looks at Abed, meaningful and sincere. “‘Cause it’d be with you.”

Abed looks at him, unsure of what to say. He doesn’t know how to put his thoughts into words, so he leans over and presses his dry lips against Jeff’s own, gently first. When Jeff leans into him and kisses back, it becomes more driven, more purposeful and intense. Kissing Jeff feels right, like it’s always been how their story progresses. It feels true like the trust his horse has in him, like Troy’s friendship, like the way whiskey tastes sharp and beer tastes dull.

Kissing Jeff feels like this is all that matters.

“You don’t know how long I’ve wanted to do that,” Abed says against his mouth, full of courage and joy as he looks at Jeff before kissing him again, like he can’t get enough of it now that he knows he can. Jeff lets him lead the kiss, tongue flicking against his lip and sighing contentedly through the kiss. His stubble scratches the corner of Abed’s mouth in a way that sort of drives him crazy.

When they part, Jeff says, “If it’s anywhere close to how long I’ve wanted to do that, then I think I’ve got an idea.” He kisses Abed’s cheek, then his jaw. “I think I’ve wanted you since the day I met you, and needed you since I started seeing you more.”

“Stop saying things that’ll make me fall harder for you and just kiss me,” Abed tells him, and relishes in the way Jeff follows immediately and kisses him again. In truth, he wants to tell Jeff so many things, wants to tell him those three pretty words that don’t exactly summarise everything he feels but sound right for someone like him, wants to hold him close until they need to stretch because their legs have numbed out, wants to talk about those plans they’re ready to form.

For now, they let their kisses speak for themselves.

**Author's Note:**

> their outfits are based off of what they’re wearing in s2e22 A Fist Full of Paintballs, hence the title. i’m obsessed with abed’s poncho in that episode, and generally i’m obsessed with the wild west era, so really this fic was entirely for me. hope yall liked it.
> 
> i’m [lakay](https://cowboylakay.tumblr.com/) on tumblr. come talk to me about jeff/abed, cowboys, both, or neither.


End file.
